How To Torture Your Teen

Posted by Jaime Buckley in Featured Articles, Just for FUN | 3 comments

Once in a while, you as a parent, should have a little fun.

I mean, you gave birth to them, you bathe them, clothe them, feed them, changed their diapers…heck you ladies have cleaned up messes that would make the Roto-rooter man puke!

Yet, the more important factor to consider here is: once in a blue moon, you should exercise your privilege of being mom and dad for the greater comic good.  It’s as simple as that.

So, if you’ve had the kind of day where your teen hasn’t listened as they should have, or maybe they hit you with some sarcasm that they should have refrained from, I want to give you a treat:

Acceptable torture for your teen.

No, this does not involve pain in any way, except maybe their ego…it’s just something that will make most teens scream and make you laugh until it hurts.  No scars, no wounds…just fun and a look of shock you’ll be able to make postcards from.  All for a couple hours of prep and a single dollar.  Seriously–just a buck.

Ready?

Go to your local dollar store and buy a bag of generic marbles.  Any kind will do, but if you happen to luck out and find some metal ones, grab ‘em–they work the best.  Now, some of us die-hard discipline, ‘honor thy mother and thy father or thou shalt be in serious crap’ parents take an extra step: buy the large metal balls used for larger game with wrist-rockets instead of the marbles.  They cost a bit more, but the level of laughter is much more satisfying.  I got mine from the local Wal-Mart.

Now take the marbles and place them in the freezer.  Don’t let the teen find them.  Paper lunch sacs works perfect.  Roll the top closed and leave them through the night.

Next, plan the time for attack.  I like to encourage my teens to stay up and watch a good movie or two, just to make sure they’re up late and really tired when they go to bed.  That way if I make a mistake, they’re too out of it to stir or care.

Take the bag, open the top and hold the bottom of the bag in your palm. DO NOT HOLD THE MARBLES IN YOUR NAKED HAND…it warms them up too fast and you miss the true effect.

Sneak into the teens room, lift up the sheets and quickly pour the marbles into the bed.  Let the sheet fall immediately behind the last marble and watch the show.

The freeze hits quickly, but the best part is watching the teen try and get away from the sensation.  No matter where they roll, the marbles follow the indentation in the bed and stick to them.  7 out of 10 times, they end up flipping out of bed, onto the floor.

Best time to do this?  Oh anytime you need a pick-me-up…but the most dramatic effects always happen in the winter months.  Teens want to stay snuggled under the covers, which amplifies my giggle reflex when they hit the floor.

Have some fun, bring a camera.  If you send me the pics, I’ll post them here if anyone’s interested.  If you have a movie and put it on Youtube, I’ll post it here as well.

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